Magnificent News: Carolyn Hax: The in-laws won’t stop hugging even when asked to stop

Sunday, January 30, 2022

Carolyn Hax: The in-laws won’t stop hugging even when asked to stop

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The in-laws won't stop hugging even when asked to stop

Dear Carolyn: How do I deal with my in-laws who insist on hugging me, despite my many statements that I'm not a hugger?

To be fair, I've been grumpy about this in the past and could have handled it in a kinder way, and I understand it's their way of expressing affection. But now it's turned into a joke at my expense and they continue to needle (and hug!) me.

My husband knows I'm uncomfortable and he's shut the jokes down on occasion, but he also thinks I should just put up with the occasional hug since they're harmless and well-meaning.

I absolutely dread visits. I'm fine with a goodbye hug, but I find "greeting hugs" or "good morning hugs" or any of the others overwhelming. There are usually a million other things going on (the dog barking, people asking a million questions, I'm burned out from the drive, and so on) and the last thing I want is to be touched or have more attention called to the fact that I'm a weirdo. I say that endearingly, for the record.

— Grumpy

Read Carolyn's Response