 (Nick Galifianakis for The Post) | Adapted from an online discussion. Dear Carolyn: I'm casually seeing this guy, and he's great. We communicate well, he's responsive to my bids for affection, and I'm overall just really happy with the relationship as it is in the moment. So why am I having anxious-attachment feelings about him?! On the rare occasion he doesn't respond to a text RIGHT AWAY, I find myself wondering whether he's bored with me and doesn't like me anymore, or whether I said something that offended him. I have to start reminding myself that we agreed to a casual relationship and that, in fact, that's exactly what I want, so it's not a big deal if he doesn't text me back right away. Then, of course, he does text me back, and we have a nice conversation, and it's clear he does still like me, and internally, I'm like, "Lol silly goose, why do you freak out so much?" I do have an anxious-preoccupied attachment style, so I know a lot of this is just how I'm wired, but it's really frustrating to feel this way. Especially when this guy gives me absolutely no reason to! I feel like a crazy person, and I just want to be able to enjoy this relationship. I'm in therapy to address this issue (and many others), but are there day-to-day things I can do to just stop feeling this way? — Why Am I Like This?! Answer this week's reader questionHere's your chance to channel your inner Carolyn Hax and respond to a reader question. |
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